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Grumpy Cat

Goes to The Ivey's Hotel

Influencer Content  |  Photo Journal  |  Comedy Cat Writing 

 
 

IN CHARLOTTE, NORTH CAROLINA...

Grumpy Cat stayed at the city's most glamorous luxury boutique, The Ivey's Hotel.  She hated it.  And so, we helped her craft a purrfectly Ill-tempered travelogue to document each disgruntled step of her stay. 

 

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I arrived at the one of a kind boutique Ivey's Hotel for a luxurious 3 night stay.
Yay.

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The staff was professional, friendly and eager to accommodate.
All of these traits, I happen to hate.

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Guests typically gather in the lobby to admire the elegant design and decor, 
which I quickly put a stop to by inconveniently napping in the middle of the floor.

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Though I might look lost, I knew exactly how to find my room.
I was just shedding some fur for the hotel staff to broom. 

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The front desk sent me a lovely bouquet of flowers to smell.
I had officially entered my own personal hell.

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Regarding these freshly baked cookies, it is true that I ate them.
But that did not change the fact that I hate them.

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Next I took a tour of Sofia’s Lounge, a space where royal opulence meets a vintage touch of Parisian flair.

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Who cares?

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I retreated to the exclusive Library Lounge to curl up with a novel from the hotel's private collection of books.
The perfect perch for giving other guests discouraging looks.

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I frowned by a map. I grew despondent on a chair.
I made a grown man cry with just an off-putting stare.

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The woman who delivered my room service said she recognized me from memes.
I advised her to promptly give up on her dreams.

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My stay was not entirely joyless.
I did enjoy using this gigantic toilet.

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The fine Italian bedding was soft, cozy and not the slightest bit lumpy.
Even still, The Ivey’s Hotel is a pretty great place to be grumpy.